If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn. I did not just catch my dad watching porn.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Like what kind of adult things? Whats more adult than drinking at 2pm on a monday?
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
I never realized the effects a broken spine would have on my sex life
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Randomize
