she told me her fantasy was her as a 55 year old cook at a truck stop who smokes a pack a day, and I was the 21 year old illegal immigarnt prep cook.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Fucking plugged the shower with taquitos I just threw up.
the girl peeing in the stall next to mine has really cute shoes. on a scale of 1 to restraining order, how weird would it be to compliment them from in here?
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
I only see on penis in this picture but I assume there is another lurking out of sight.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
also, sleeping with your chipotle guy sounds like a good idea until you want chipotle on your day off and have to look somewhat presentable to acquire said chipotle.
I see the guy who's been trying to get me to let him eat my ass became engaged on Facebook today; would framed screen shots be an appropriate wedding present?
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
Just saw a commercial for non alcoholic baileys cream. WHAT THE HELL IS THE POINT?!
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
Randomize
