I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
And then you gave the bride a high five and said "Go forth and Consummate."
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
oh and then you called a time out with your penis
Do you think making a dress out of an "Open" flag that my friend stole from a bar, and wearing it out sends the wrong message? ....Or exactly the right message?
Ok how about tonight me and you get laid together. Same girl. Then she signs our dicks.
As weird as it sounds I would totally be down
My very favorite thing in the whole world is when guys try to booty call her as I'm fucking her. Sucks to suck.
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
