Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
then you asked me to turn your jeans into "jorts" just long enough to cover your ballsack
I just wiped my vajayjay with snow. Bad idea.
I seriously just washed my dick in a public restroom. That's how dirty last night got
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
almost got into it with the cashier. bitch dont look at me like that just cuz im only buying wine and icing. ill fight.
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
You were taking in your sleep. You were like Jess that's that animal we were talking about and you Hugged her feet
I got high and had sex with reindeer antlers on. It was magical and animalistic. Tia the season.
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
did he think i wouldnt notice the naked girl in the backseat
Randomize
