If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
I just met the neighbor hes a self proclaimed coke dealer/ softporn producer.
Damn you and your Monday night power hours.
Freshman ate returning to campus. Let Operation Slut Storm commence.
Between the dance party in the car and the distraction of the momma bear and two cubs im a cops wet dream roght now when comes to wreckless driving.
I apologize for violently hooking up with her in front of you in the jacuzzi last night.
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Bad things happen to those who bang their lab partner at the beginning of the semester.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
Also, can next Friday be Long Underwear Friday instead of Jockstrap Friday? Because I'm about to cough up a testicle.
honestly the most stressful part of moving is the chance my mom will find my vibrator
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Hey every now and then can you tell me you want to fuck me to boost my confidence? Thanks.
Randomize
