She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
You are like a prophet. It's amazing how many people you convince to be lesbians.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Change of plans. Theres a bouncy castle setup in my apartment complex.
You're making her cookies in enchange for knitting lessons. You will die a virgin.
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
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