: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
drunkie insisted on stuffing the rest of his scrambled eggs in his pockets before we left ihop. we really should have left a better tip
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
First booty call in Europe.. In Barcelona. With a German. In broad daylight.... Is that how they do it here?
The shit I just took made me regret every life decision leading up to it.
If I don't go to Australia I'm using that towards a new car. If I do I'll use it to buy a koala.
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
Going through my bras is like traveling back in time through my past hookups and relationships....
He made me a flamingo drink and now I don't know why things are the way they are.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
I think I just received the most dignified proposition of my life. From the father of the bride. Who'd have thought.
Getting knocked up by someone with a good job and a big dick, okay. I can handle that. Getting knocked up by someone who sells dildos for a living and has a tiny dick, SOMEBODY is losing a pair of balls.
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