Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I love online classes. Spent the last part of my lecture taking apart a teabag and filling it with weed.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
it wasn't THAT bad but he definitely called his dick an asshole and said sorry to my vagina
One question: Why is your trash can full of blood and pop-tarts?
this kid woke up on our hotel floor and doesnt know how he got here
on my way back.. me and that kid will be great friends
I still count it as showing your tits. Even though the wall was the only one who saw anything. Your boyfriend was pissed.
....I feel like you are deciding whether or not I'm good enough for you based on what I ordered from Chipotle.
I try new drugs instead of new boys. That way you can't scold me about the importance of condoms
You were supposed to be my wingman and all you kept to her friend was "kill it with fire"..
Just broke into a house and crawled through a window. Upside: getting laid.
who has a one night stand on Christmas ? But he's pretty attractive so thumbs up
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
Can you hurry up? Jamie just challenged my ex boyfriend to a duel and someone honest to God handed her a sword?
She didn't have her own?
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
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