From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
He was with one girl when I went to bed, wad with another when I woke up and now he just told me he was with a 3rd in-between last night and this morning. Jesus Christ.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
we played a my little pint drinking game. It was awesome.
also Jesus you really need to change your diet. I just washed your baby gravy out of my hair and it's so acidic my hair is damaged. You have killer sperm
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
I can't go to class, I have all this weed to sell
We got to his house, cuddled while watching game of thrones, then fucked during the repeat airing.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I can't believe that after 9 years of signing things as "BATMAN", the first place to turn it down was the liquor store down the block.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
that may or may not have been my penis.
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