For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I think my vagina is haunted
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
The neighbors are smoking hash and doing Julia Child impressions...again.
DDing is such a bittersweet job, just got the entire history of this girls hookup career
Where was your thought process?
Drowning in my hangover.
I want to celebrate with you...
There's nothing I'd like more than a celebratory "The guy I'm doing just found out he's not a baby daddy" dinner.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
THIS IS THE EMERGENCY BOOZE SYSTEM. I AM EN ROUTE TO DEWITT WITH A FIFTH OF TEQUILA. THIS IS NOT A TEST
It's a "party harder or raise your standards" kind if night.
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
The other day, he sent me a snapchat of his dick in the forest. He captioned it "nature nudes."
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Randomize
