Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
I just Organized my jello shots by their colors in my mini fridge for the rest of the week. I'm going places in life.
I told him I'd give him a BJ if he admited Hanson was good.
my mom just texted me to let me know that Hooters is hiring
i wish my mom had big dreams like that for me
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
you really dont want me to drink and drive. you saw what i did to my face and that was only from walking
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
We just stood outside and debated the existence of mermaids for about 20 min. Is this what too drunk is?
BOOM BITCH SERVES YOU RIGHT I HOPE YOU SHIT YOURSELF PETER PAN
I HAVE A STRAIGHT LINE ACROSS MY ASS ABOUT THE WIDTH OF A SLIM JIM. ERICA!
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
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