shit! I think I may have lost something in your car. Look for anything that can possibly belong to me, especially look out for a pair of pink panties in a ziplock. I lost my spare and you better find it before someone else does.
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
You can't have your penis and eat it, too.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
Where the hell is he. I called him crying for weed and sex you would think that would signal some urgency.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
I called my mom while I was blackout drunk, and told her I was drunk, safe, and happy. But really, I was just drunk.
she was concerned about my dick piercings.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Blunts beyotch
What? Joints? Blunts?
I'll refer you to my previous text: "Blunts beyotch"
Randomize
