All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Was it cool?
About as cool as only getting a handjob on your honeymoon.
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
I'm proud of us, I'm cleaning up the place and I haven't found a single beer can that isn't empty.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
Well i'm not entirely sure considering he gave my vagina an early valentine's day card that said "you're purrfect."
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
When you get up and look at yourself in the mirror, don't be alarmed. The doctor assured us last night that it looked way worse than it actually was and there won't be a scar when the stitches come out
Just applied for assistance with paying my hospital bill from my alcohol poisoning at age 16 while still a little drunk from last night. What is my life.
Circle of life?
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Do you think I can get away with quoting Work Bitch by Britney Spears in my speech?
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
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