lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
I made him tell me how he proposed to his wife before I'd bang him. I have a problem.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
running the faucet water is not hiding the sound of you vomiting. fyi.
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Travis is back on this booty and burgers thing. If I'm his delivery service for food he better fuck me how I want.
There was a group of girls next to us. One was smiling at me. I only remember walking up and saying "oh you're Russian". Not sure where it went from there
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
If there is a ladylike way to throw up in your favorite toilet, I just did it.
Just took a shower for the sole purpose of getting off without using my hands... I've reached a new level of summer-lazy.
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Randomize
