This is some kinda fucked up sordid doggy brothel peepshow bullshit.
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
dude, im still at the bar with two chics... one has a moustache ill save that one for you... be home in 20min..
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
Hooked up with 8 guys, puked 4 times, got a few bruises, and my face is still numb... I think this visit has truly impacted my college decision
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
Hungover/still slightly drunk at work. Opened a bag of cheese with a box cutter. Pretty sure I need stitches.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
Out of control sex drive for a girl? I just masturbated in the bathroom at my in-laws house before dinner....
She tried to subtly measure me, but I noticed. She told me I barely made the cut otherwise there would have been just a handshake as a parting gift.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Annoying and petty is the name of the game and I'm the MVP.
Randomize
