Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I was about to buy asher roth's album and then i realized he was a ginger. can't support
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
Apparently having him hold an open book in front of me while i'm blowing him doesn't count as studying...
The bruises are from paintball. The money is from me being awesome
Hm, finding a time when my drinking and your real life don't conflict could be difficult
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
My mom has a bong in her bathroom, but no air freshener.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
Randomize
