I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
We got a Christmas tree, decorated it to surprise his wife And kids who were out of town for her father's funeral, then fucked like rabbits on their new mattress before he had to pick them up at the airport.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
We lost Kevin again. Probably kidnapped by fattie 2 or butter-face 2 from last night. We need names and any information you can give us. Last scene with his shoe laces converted into a belt.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Well, we broke up and instead of putting my shit out on the curb like a normal person, she fucking donated everything to Goodwill. So now I have to pay two dollars for one of my own t shirts.
Did you put pizza in my boxers last night?
I left you 4 hours ago. Have you been walking around with shit in your pants all day?
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
He's far too busy staring into my soul to touch my tits.
The tequila monkeys have a drum solo in my skull right now. I can't imagine Emily feels better.
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
