porn bloobers exist! never have i laughed so hard while jerking off!
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
i think there mostly mad about the fact it was 6 pm not the fact i blew a .255
We're smoking a joint the size of the average penis right now. I may not survive.
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
high as fuck. watching parent trap with my mom. keep missing my mouth.
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
You don't know commitment until you try and waterproof a non-waterproof vibrator
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
You get home ok?
Uh, you stopped by my house at 4 am and woke me up, so yeah.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I had to get my boss birth control a work today. I knew going to ASU would come in handy in my career someday.
Found like seven bruises in the shower. One was shaped like a hand. Best. Sex. Ever.
Dude, don't beat around the bush. We're fucked and you know it.
Randomize
