just jacked off with my ROTC uniform on. boy i feel like an american.
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
She can't meet us until 830...there's no hope for our sobriety at that hour
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
At what point did you realize I was getting blown under the table during our dominos game?
It isn't about the beer pong. It is about the destruction of the patriarchy.
sitting in the prison waiting room in my boyfriends clothes. looooong story.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
OH GOD IT TASTES LIKE IT SMELLS
You can help me! We'll make an occasion of it. Have some rum, make some smores, condemn the email system to the pits of hell...
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