i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
it's been like two and a half months. And I swear, I keep seeing walking dicks. I think I'm going crazy cause of lack of sex..
currently shading my boobs to make it look like i have mass cleavage...thanks art school
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Just got a picture message from my sister of the two of us wearing cowboy hats and pressing our bare asses together. Do you remember enough to explain?
Not going outside. I may melt into a puddle of wine
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Who needs sounds of the ocean? I just fall asleep to whatever chubby he is banging next door.
I woke up in a strange bathroom. Was I blonde when you left me last night?
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
I had to give myself a suppository. That was the LEAST fun I've had inserting things in my ass.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
Randomize
