I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
Replacing day drinking with a real job was the worst decision I've ever made.
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Still bad at ganbling. Still good at dringing.
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Because I was drunk or stoned for 4 days. I either made terrible decisions or none at all.
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Have you ever had to act sober and talk to an authority figure in a coconut bra? Because it is just as degrading as you would imagine.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
Last night I watered my lawn and smoked a joint then cooked a steak. I'm really killing this adulthood thing.
Lol for real, I'm Kylie Jenner "this is my year of realizing things" right now
Our sex sesh was interrupted by a bunch of hobos fighting outside his apartment.
Randomize
