I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
I've come to accept that no matter where I step in our apartment, your underwear will be there.
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
I know it's not technically the "Mile High Club" but we def need a name for the airport bathroom. Cuz that just happened.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
I just fell down my stairs, guess that's how my sunday is gonna go
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
You should frame my arrest warrant.
I'm watching Part of Your World now and I'm crying and I feel like I'm floating right along with her. This. This right here is some drunken Disney Magic
Had a girl with a moustache tattoo on her hand give me a handjob. That shit was classy as fuck. I felt like I should be wearing a monocle or something.
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
Randomize
