can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
Okay so if I'm going to keep referring to my hangover in the third person it needs a name.
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I'd rather say I'm a whore then admit it's his child. Its that bad.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
If we laid all the dicks that's have been inside of us end to end it would be as tall as 4 story building. 40 feet of dicks.
He is 30 (that's 8 years older than I am) and uses more Emojis than I do. Problem?
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
My diet has been 80% Fun Dip this week, soooo, no. Not good.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Details are irrelevant. Come bail me out of jail.
i like beer, sex, and cooking. what more can he want?
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
