Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I have a love/hate relationship when men come within a 10 minute time frame.
white trash bash was a total success...cops shut it down twice and her hair stayed in rollers all night..she never broke character
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
there is laundry and salad ALL OVER my car, i need context
Idk if I woke up next to a cat or raccoon. either way it's purring.
We had a deepthroating contest with breadsticks at Olive Garden
Excuse me while I download incredibly disturbing porn until I'm more ashamed of myself than of my country.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
We are both federal employees and Obama gave us a four-day weekend to lie in bed. Do you know how many orgasms that will be? I knew there was a reason I voted for this guy.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
my night stand is a mini fridge, dont even try to get on my level of laziness.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
