i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
You kept calling me your small dog last night.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
get home. someone threw up in the fishtank last night.
Scott woke me up by cracking a beer open in my face. Best friends are awesome.
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
Alas, very true. I'll sell some of my eggs and give you like 10%
And with my 90% I'll get a scooter with a sidecar. And a pony. Also with sidecar.
I'm not gonna lie; I was dosed with mushrooms and am eating pickles with a guy in all white. It's weird, but I'm down. Help.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
Water park on acid. THIS NEEDS TO HAPPEN!!
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Almost gave myself a concussion stealing a stuffed unicorn hanging on a street sign but hey I got home safe
I had more orgasms than hours of sleep this weekend. I’m going to keep him around a while
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