i have a strong urge to join the asians in the park doing tai chi. I think im still high .
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
Well, if your day started with strippers, then we're tied. Otheriwse, I'm winning.
Wow. He pulled out his dick and I swear I heard a thud from it hitting the floor.
She's the second Ashley to meet and blow me in the same night. Sensing a trend.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.
And as the acid sets in, he looks back at the shallow form he used to call his and whispers "3 pee pees strong"
I know he’s married, but he’s still a guy with balls and a dick. He noticed my cleavage and stared at my ass. He’ll call.
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
