i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
Life is so much better when you know you're gonna get laid soon.
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
The ONLY reason I am doing laundry is because all my sweatpants are dirty.
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
I ate too many pot brownies and passed out topless with my boobs painted like the American flag
Haha I had a heart to heart with a stripper so I would say it was a success?
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
Randomize
