Dude I just witnessed a midget touching himself and singing the chorus to somebodys watching me by michael jackson... it kinda turned me on
That's why you don't touch shit after fingering somebone
Unless I'm getting a singing midget telegram, I'm not going to smile
it was like getting a handjob from mrs. butterworth
last night was fun... but i spent all morning tring to get the candle wax out of my chest hair. We did use candles last night?
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
You stayed up for three hours wasted, feeding my rabbit 2 1/2 boxes of girl scout cookies.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Driving around Panama at 7 am looking for an open liquor store..
If we accept the love we think we deserve do we also accept the sex we think we deserve?
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
You'll be like the drunk Paul Bunyan someday with a giant grey cat
Please clarify that he is speaking of beer pong and not rough sex
last night I used snow as a chaser
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