It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
[insert really romantic bullshit about how much i love you and how beautiful you are so you will suck my dick tonight]
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
He did a line, told me my hair looked pretty against the background of the clouds, and then we fucked. Good afternoon
Be still, my beating vagina.
OH MY GOD MY GRANDMA JUST SHOWED ME HER BOOB OH. MY. GOD.
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
Wouldn't life be so much easier if you could just walk up to attractive men and say, "Let me bear your children" and it wouldn't be creepy?
Or possibly end in a restraining order?
My only regret this past weekend is abusing only 3 substances when I could have done so much more.
Best thing I ever did was get a dog. She's like a living trip alarm to warn me of visitors while I'm masturbating.
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