yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
I'd cum for enchiladas.
Handcuffed our DD to a naked stripper don't think he will try to sneak out
He can pick locks you know
That's the reason for the naked stripper
The last time I went to Vegas and the sun started to rise, my copilot went home with her nipples pierced.
I told my grandmother all I want is a nice guy who likes to be tied up.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
I mean, I was going to use them for a beading project, but I guess I could take one and let you bat my dick around like a cat toy.
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Randomize
