If you text me again I will gut all of your stuffed animals.
happiness is walking an amphibious rodent on a leash
my mom just informed me that i masturbate loudly
does drinking everclear count as brushing your teeth? because i think they are sterilized
we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Omg I just met another drunk guy that is teaching me karate
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
you said you couldn't hang because you had to masturbate and feed your lizard
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I AM GONNA CUM EVERYWHERE TONIGHT BRO.
Girl i am always here for you. But i am going to have sex now so im going to call you in the morning.
she said a prayer for the pipe you broke. she did the sign of the cross and everything
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