I went to the gynecologist and they said, "you're the most fun person we've ever had," and i thought, "that's exactly why i'm here!"
you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
You came into my room and started rubbing a banana on your face.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
My roommate just google searched "cumming blood" using my laptop. Her boyfriend is in her room, she looks scared. Words cannot explain how hilarious this is.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
You need to go! It’s a midwestern wedding - the single girls out there think life ends at 25 if they don’t have a picket fence and family. That’s when your penis introduces himself
Randomize
