Some girl just toasted to friendship and love. I want to break her neck.
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Vodka is such a love hate relationship.
Truer words have never been spoken.
My TA just asked me why I was late to class. How do I say because I was having the best orgasm of my life in Arabic?
There's an australian, my relationship has no hope.
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
I sleep with the gay men, they no longer have questions about their sexuality. No strings attached at it's finest and i get new shopping buddies out if it. It really is a win win situation.
You are my idol.
I still think he fell and scraped his elbow and lost his credit card buying 8 hot chocolates for hobos
We're like a dynamic duo.
Bisexual and Proud, Lesbian and Loud.
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
I ripped off the screen and literally supermaned through my bedroom window. That wasted
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
It doesn't matter how nice the shirt you wore to the bar was, you still shouldn't have worn it to a job interview
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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