first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
you could never motorboat her...you'd have to motor-titanic her
if theres anything i pride myself on, its my ability to look homeless.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
I call BS on that! THAT WAS TOTALLY AN INTERCEPTION. JENNINGS HAD THAT.
PEOPLE ARE FLIPPING FURNITURE HERE. IN THE ROOM ABOVE ME. I HEARD SOMEONE WOOKIE CALL IN ANGER FROM SOMEWHERE IN THIS BUILDING.
I'd be lying if I said I wasn't scared, even a little.
Is it weird that I noticed my lower half feels strange and then further realized it's bc I'm wearing underwear to bed for the first time in weeks..maybe months?
I feel like cursing someone's first born child right now. Like I wanna maleficent some bitch.
I think I was high. I asked a dude at chillis if they had a cereal buffet
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
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