Mmmm, vodka for breakfast
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
If im paying 4grand for laser eye surgery, it better help with beer goggles cuz last night was pretty rough.
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
There is no amount of alcohol that can make me forget I had a Jimmy Kimmel sex dream
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
We made out and he didn't grope me. I liked it. I felt like I was innocent again.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
I'm not into beards but apparently my vagina is.
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