who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
I gave him a blowie and after he said he wanted to send a giftbasket to the girl we met through.
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
So what do you think the policy is on vomit in rental cars? do I have to clean that up or is that part of the service I'm paying for?
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
i'm drinking margaritas from a pouch...really dont think i'm in the position to judge anyone...
Im in Ft Meyers right now looking right at an alligator. I have had a couple of beers and people are telling me not to feed him but Im gonna do it anyway.
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
At least she'll always have a story about the time she showed up to the emergency room drunk and covered in chocolate syrup on her birthday.
my grandpa is going down the line on this prom picture, and telling me how big everyone's nipples are... he was spot on for me.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
On today's episode of "What the Shit Did I Do Last Night," drunk me deleted ALL of the text messages I've ever had. Awesome.
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