So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
we walked in to her beating him with a broom while he was trying to sweep ramen into a box. there were packing peanuts everywhere.
He showed up to fuck me at the same time the pizza guy did. It was like everything I needed just showed up at my stoop.
I don't care if shes your sisters age. Once someone is on my to do list theres only one way to get them off it
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
TGIFridays...stall number 1...drunk...send help
I just set a reminder on my phone to get star spangled hammered this weekend.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
