Honestly there's alot of things I'm confused about the only thing I know for certain about last night is that I ate pizza
what kind of vibe do I give off that a guy i've never hung out with thinks its okay to send me a picture of his ball cleavage?
felt a little awkward waiting for my McNuggets after vomiting all over the counter
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
you go from almost hooking up with the hottest guy at the party, to going home with your ex....how is that even mathematically possible
I was in my bathroom taking a shit and my mom just opened the door, walked in, handed me a fudgesicle, and left without saying a word. Yeah. That just happened.
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
I punched some guy in the face for being an asshole then later I went to say sorry and give him a hug and he started making out with me. How was your new years?
All you had to say was "damn dude that looks fun, I miss ice fishing." But you sent a picture of poop. Classy
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
I went down on her on the dining room table. That should count for something.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I'm like the total package- I don't want a relationship and I have daddy issues. What more could he want?
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