I lost my shoes and bra and was beyond mapquesting
I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
you kept telling everyone how your ninja turtle shell also functioned as a backpack
when she asked where we met, i said the liquor store. the next words out of moms mouth? 'oh that's real promising molly'
I should have but it might be too early in this fuckbuddyship to emasculate him
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I'm eating a piece of cake like an apple. At least my thought process is healthy.
Hey so I just want to get straight to the point it was me who ate the last cupcake and it was your sister who I fucked last nigt
dude my grandma just called my dealer. How does this shit happen to me
And it was in that moment when I realized that these high schoolers looked up to me and that I should set a good example. So I stole a casserole and left.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
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