this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
someone needs to make a hangover cure that isn't cocaine.
he stopped talking to me after i tried to use his body as a surf board
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Every time I burp I plan an escape route because I'm scared I'm gonna puke on grandma
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
He called me dainty, then fucked me like the Viking God he is.
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize
