i'm forgoing the post-coitus cuddling sesh to ask u this :when he says he loves me and all i can think to say is either "cool" or "i love boning you," what do i do?
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
I distinctly remember seeing your nipples from the deck.
i would like you to please flash back to us blacked out in the bathroom when you told me i needed to take one for the team and have a threesome with you and jon to help your relationship. you then told me you had no issue putting ghb in my drink to make it happen.
He asked her to marry him and she said yes. There is NO WAY she knows about his penchant for wearing lingerie.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
In the future, could you not call me 'bro' while we're having sex?
My one night stand from last night is currently mowing my lawn for me.
Apparently I was drunk enough to call he police station and ask if there was a problem with me.
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
