if im not pregnant im gonna be so pissed for spending the money from my weed fund on the test
wow, a mother in the making
Maybe you can hide out somewhere she would never go. Like a counseling center or AA
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
He picked me up in the very car he devirginized me in, his moms toyota.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
Damn you. I'm in a bar with Southern Jesus Fearing Blah Blah Rednecks WHO ARE PROBABLY VOTING FOR TRUMP and you go radio silent.
I say I'm working from home on conference call days, but really I just mute the phone, put that shit on speaker so I can hear what's going on, and let Marcus fuck my brains out.
Yeah well, last time I said I wasn't having a big night I was being strangled in somebody's spare bed
THERES A BEAVER CHASING ME, ANGRY BEAVERS IS FUCKING REAL DUDE
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Our Uber driver pulled over to show us Tinder some dick pics. Top that.
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
