I just got called an ass for saying no thanks to a Greenpeace solicitor. I don't want the whales to die but I do want Greenpeace to fail. Conundrum.
if reincarnation is for serious, i better be a guy in my next life
with a huge shlong
massive. i wanna make bitches cry
I'm actually agreeing with glenn beck. What the FUCK was in that margarita?!
I heard porn and smelled bacon cooking. I knew you had to be home.
Doctorate. Vaginahole. Cinnamon. Rainbow. Fill in the blanks in the morning.
Thank god the bicycalist i hit was on drugs
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I will buy you batman underwear babe. I'll make sure you wear them every time we have to adult.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
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