the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I think i peed on brittanys purse
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
She asked if you knew her boyfriend, and you responded that you "think you gave him head once" and then hiccupped.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
We need to feng shui this bitch.
i told him the only way i'd fuck him was if he saved me during the zombie apocolypse and took me to a tastefully decorated yet impenetrable hideout.
Randomize
