he actually proposed, and i threw up on him...i guess 5 glasses of wine was a bad idea.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
you were crying because peter frampton wasnt your dad
Pretending to care to care about playoffs in exchange for free shots. I'm sorry in advance.
Here's the thing. I'm really high and have lots of questions about lightning.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Watching the tv in the reflection of my phone cause I'm too hungover to roll over.... Yes it is 4 PM...
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
3 2 1 whiskey
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
why did you kick open the doors at church screaming whos ready to party?
Randomize
