i'm not a human right now. not even a dancer.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
At least you get to smell pizza at your job. I just smell despair all day long.
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
It's okay to admit that you're into redheads.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
