Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
I don't know whether I should be pissed that there's glitter in my bed or proud that there's semen in there too.
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Ok forget what i said about christmas break being awful. Chasing shots with fudge
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
I just called my boyfriend "Dad"... Awkward
I look at it as community service. He was going through a rough time and I gave him an ego boost. That's how we're going to remember it. I was doing a good deed lol
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Like he legitimately was standing straight up, feet on the roof, not holding on to a moving car.
Randomize
