can you have the cops turn on the gps locator on my phone...i just woke up in a Hooters uniform and I have no idea where I am...
i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
Well you broke that rule when you put it in your mouth.
Can't show you right now as we are in public and he refuses to let me photograph his penis in a bar.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
I think she faked a seizure to get out of it ...
She tried to sleep on the front steps of her salon so she wouldn't be late for work and these people put her in a cab to my house. She is nothing if not responsible. Can u imagine her boss finding her there this morning?
Employee of the year! :)
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
No matter how drunk I am or how drunk I'll ever be I love you
i don't remember going ever taking off my pants but my pubes are shaved into a K and kelsey is passed out in the shower.
My hangover headache is somewhere in the Harry Potter scar neighborhood. I can now empathize with that poor bastard.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
you missed a good time last night.
you texted me at 10 telling me to come fuck you, that says enough.
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