I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
there is mayo everywhere what the fuckkkk
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
Are you dead or are you taking another 13 hour nap? you need to let me know these things ahead of time so i dont worry.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
Do you know how much wine is in a box of wine? Not so much an amount, but whether it will kill me if I drink the entire box this xmas
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
You tried to see how many socks you can stuff in yor mouth and I just put on a damp sock. Is this what bestfriends have come to these days???
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