So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
apparently went to arby's at 2:30am banging on the windows for someone to make me a "beefy"
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
there is no way he can be that small
look on the bright side he'll over comepensate
If it looks like I didn't change from last night, it's because I didn't.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
Wellp yesterday was spent absurdly hungover and today was spent in planned parenthood so I hope that's not an indication of the year to come
Had to lock my cat in the bathroom so I could masturbate in peace.
I've been sober for almost two weeks and it's been the worst two weeks ever. Even my mom told me I need to start drinking again.
I hate that I will forever be known as the girl who puked on the front lawn. That only happened once.
I just bartered a blowjob for the ex-fiancée's engagement ring. FTW!
Randomize
